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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Steven Byks' LiveJournal:

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Thursday, March 4th, 2010
2:41 pm
I'll follow you until you love me
If over half of marriages end in divorce, does that mean that lifelong monogamy is sexual deviance?

Current Mood: listless
Monday, February 22nd, 2010
11:58 am
Boycott the Olympics!!!
I witnessed a car accident while I was driving to work this morning. It all happened behind me, so I wasn't in much danger. I just happen to look up at my rear view mirror the moment that the whole thing started. This station wagon was almost done passing a semitruck, but as soon as he started moving back into the right hand lane, he lost control of his vehicle. He almost spun out right in front of the semi, then careened into the median through all the deep snow. The whole thing lasted like 5 seconds. It was really weird.

Afterward I wondered how many accidents have happened immediately behind my car that I've never noticed.

Current Mood: tired
Thursday, February 11th, 2010
1:36 pm
I'm going in for the kill, I'm doing it for the thrill...
Based on consensus of various websites, the divorce rate in America is approximately 1/2 for first marriages, 2/3 for second marriages, and 3/4 for third marriages. This somehow lead me to the conclusion that people who believe in lifelong monogamous relationships (I'll leave it up to the reader to pick a stereotypical group to represent these people) must be sexual deviants.
Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010
12:13 pm
insert serious comment here
routine infant circumcision is a barbaric and violent ritual which permanently harms its victims. help end it: http://tinyurl.com/yg9mwe3
Friday, January 29th, 2010
1:08 pm
Tony and I are homeowners!!!
Friday, January 22nd, 2010
2:05 pm
From The Straight Dope:
link

"By what tortured reasoning did the Supreme Court decide that corporations were protected by the 14th Amendment, which everyone knows was enacted to protect the rights of real people? Answer: Apparently it didn't decide. As revealed by our friend bex--and detailed by Thom Hartmann in Unequal Protection: The Rise of Corporate Dominance and the Theft of Human Rights (2002)--the whole thing began as a courtroom comment by a judge, which was elevated to the status of legal precedent by an overreaching court reporter.

Here's what happened. Santa Clara County in California was trying to levy a property tax against the Southern Pacific Railroad. The railroad gave numerous reasons why it shouldn't have to pay, one of which rested on the 14th Amendment's equal protection clause: the railroad was being held to a different standard than human taxpayers.

When the case reached the Supreme Court, Chief Justice Morrison Waite supposedly prefaced the proceedings by saying, "The Court does not wish to hear argument on the question whether the provision in the Fourteenth Amendment to the Constitution which forbids a state to deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws applies to these corporations. We are all of the opinion that it does." In its published opinion, however, the court ducked the personhood issue, deciding the case on other grounds.

Then the court reporter, J.C. Bancroft Davis, stepped in. Although the title makes him sound like a mere clerk, the court reporter is an important official who digests dense rulings and summarizes key findings in published "headnotes." (Davis had already had a long career in public service, and at one point was president of the board of directors for the Newburgh & New York Railroad Company.) In a letter, Davis asked Waite whether he could include the latter's courtroom comment--which would ordinarily never see print--in the headnotes. Waite gave an ambivalent response that Davis took as a yes. Eureka, instant landmark ruling."

Current Mood: aggravated
Thursday, January 21st, 2010
3:35 pm
I was telling Tony last night how I like to cut my spaggetti into squares when I'm eating it, and then we both heard someone on TV say, "Are you retarded?" It was quite humorous and appropriate.

Current Mood: good
Thursday, December 17th, 2009
2:02 pm
from Romans 8, Paul says "and it is said that we must construct additional pylons..."
from the internet:

"is there anything in video game land that is the relative equivalent of, I don't know, Moby Dick, or The Great Gatsby...?"

response:

"So, a game that you were semi-forced to play in school even though you thought it mostly sucked? Sure. Number Munchers."

I actually liked Number Munchers btw.

Current Mood: good
Friday, November 13th, 2009
12:17 pm
we see a literal binary chronology following the Heaven Ascending pattern
So I need to talk about something real quick so that the cogs in my brain will stop uselessly spinning at full speed. In my recent web surfing adventures, I came across a blog mostly devoted to the Fat Acceptance Movement (FAM). Now I'm not sure how new this movement is, but it's pretty new to me and I've been hearing more and more about it recently. As far as I can tell, the core principal of the movement is that despite the constant bombardment from the popular media with messages of shame and guilt for being being overweight, every person regardless of what their bathroom scale says deserves the same respect as a human being and should hold her(his)self in the same esteem.

I can totally get behind that. But when I think about it, I keep hearing this voice in my head over and over again. It's Brad Pitt and he's saying, "you are not your khakis. you are not the contents of your wallet. you are not your weight." And it's at that moment that I suddenly can't support the FAM. The FAM encourages overweight people to identify with their weight, and to associate it with who they are. "I'm overweight and I love myself." is a phrase I keep seeing in connection with the FAM. Would you not love yourself if you were not overweight? When you look at the other side of the coin, the whole movement seems quite ridiculous.

This also reminds me that I've had a burning desire to watch Fight Club for months now.

Current Mood: good
Thursday, November 5th, 2009
4:28 pm
i love lamp
BEST RIDDLE EVAR:

A hundred prisoners are each locked in a room with three pirates, one of whom will walk the plank in the morning. Each prisoner has 10 bottles of wine, one of which has been poisoned; and each pirate has 12 coins, one of which is counterfeit and weighs either more or less than a genuine coin. In the room is a single switch, which the prisoner may either leave as it is, or flip. Before being led into the rooms, the prisoners are all made to wear either a red hat or a blue hat; they can see all the other prisoners' hats, but not their own. Meanwhile, a six-digit prime number of monkeys multiply until their digits reverse, then all have to get across a river using a canoe that can hold at most two monkeys at a time. But half the monkeys always lie and the other half always tell the truth. Given that the Nth prisoner knows that one of the monkeys doesn't know that a pirate doesn't know the product of two numbers between 1 and 100 without knowing that the N+1th prisoner has flipped the switch in his room or not after having determined which bottle of wine was poisoned and what color his hat is, what is the solution to this puzzle?

Current Mood: good
3:42 pm
I"VE GOT A G D RIDDLE FOR "YA!!!
WHAT"S IN MY POCKET!?!?!?!?!

Current Mood: bitchy
Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009
5:25 pm
I pull my feathered hair whenever I see floating cloth...
Murphy's Razor - The simpler something should be, the more complicated it will be.

Current Mood: distressed
Tuesday, October 6th, 2009
11:17 am
oh noes, a blost!
Another sighting the other day. I didn't get a good look at it, but it was definitely a ghost. It was totally flying over Ann Arbor and then ducked into some clouds and didn't come out.

So yeah, I think my LJ is only gonna get used for UFO reports :/

Current Mood: good
Thursday, August 27th, 2009
8:43 am
Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air…
So who else saw the "alien spacecraft" that flew over Ann Arbor last night? Strange light pattern, flying really low, "suddenly" turned 90 degrees...

Current Mood: calm
Monday, July 6th, 2009
1:58 am
holy shit!
Holy shit I went to Pittsburgh to get a nose job and there's furries here!?!?

Current Mood: embarrassed
Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
9:29 am
these endless numbered days
I'm back with adventures from tech support land. The sad adventures though, not the fun type. I'm trying to get support for my gigabyte motherboard, as the sound drivers won't seem to install themselves properly. So I send them an email, and we go back and forth through the usual crap. After 5 replies they eventually tell me the same thing I told them in my original email, the drivers aren't installed properly.

Well I could have told you that! Oh wait, I DID TELL YOU THAT. I realize that they have some manual that they have to follow when troubleshooting, fine. Now that you have some idea of what's wrong, we can fix it. So at this point I'm expecting that they're going to walk me through the process to reinstall my drivers properly. No. They send back the following reply:

"Were you able to configured the audio properties and see whether if it is set to mute and volume are raise up?"

I could not even make this shit up. In one reply they tell me the drivers aren't installed (based on a screenshot I provided which clearly shows no drivers installed), and in the very next reply they think the problem is the sound is muted? Am I taking crazy pills?!?

So I will never buy another gigabyte product again. This is ridiculous.

Current Mood: aggravated
Monday, May 11th, 2009
3:52 pm
I FUCKING HATE IPODS. THAT IS ALL.
p.s. Rap Chop is like my new favorite song.

Current Mood: angry
Monday, December 22nd, 2008
9:27 pm
What day is it today?
You're shopping at the mall and a stranger walks up and asks, "Excuse me, what's the date today?" "It's the 22nd." You answer. "Of...?" They ask back. "December."

Seriously. It's 3 days till Christmas, how do you not know what month it is? Tony and I were at the mall Christmas shopping, and while we were in F.Y.E. there was this guy asking every person in the store what day it was. But I think that I just realized why. At the time, I thought he was just hopped up on goofballs or something, but now I don't think that's it at all. I think he was a time traveler!!

Also, fuck Microsoft. Their products are all crap.

Current Mood: Upset
Tuesday, March 4th, 2008
10:15 am
Perhaps Fritalian?
Now I've always thought that Starbucks was pretentious and stupid. Recently though, I've been spurred to investigate the possibility of authenticity of the American coffee industry's naming conventions. Much to my surprise, some of it is. In general, the drinks themselves are named after the original Italian drinks they are trying to mimic. There are some discrepancies though. For example, latte is just the Italian word for milk which is what you should get if you ordered one. In America though, we use it as shorthand for caffellatte (or caffè e latte), literally coffee with milk. As far as I can tell, the rest of the menu is nothing more than a marketing scheme. Ordering a "grande" or a "venti" feels more empowering than ordering a medium or large the way you would at a McDonald's. This helps make rich white people feel even more rich and white than they already are. Also, the idea of ordering your coffee "wet" or "dry" is just ludicrous. Shouldn't all coffee be wet by default? What would a dry coffee even be, a cup of freshly ground beans?

While I was researching, I found this humorous posting on the taxonomy of coffee sizes:

http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/001677.html


P.S. Firefox's spell checker doesn't agree with my spelling of caffellatte. Comically, it suggests replacing it with the word "fellatio."
8:36 am
Writer's Block: Charmed, I'm Sure
What is a "charmed life"?

I have a different definiton for a "charmed life." It's not a magical fairytale life where you have a perfect job, perfect marriage, and a perfect family. A person who is living a charmed life is really living outside of reality. That person thinks that (s)he is happy b/c (s)he doesn't know how bad off (s)he is. (S)He thinks that the world is a magical happy place, b/c (s)he doesn't really understand what a miserable and wretched place it is that we live in. A charmed life isn't a perfect life, it's a perfect lie.
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